Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Review: that Olay Professional Prox Pro-X crappe

Olay Professional

I posted a review of the sunscreen pictured above on BlogHer's Beauty Hacks, so this will be the stripped down, factory-settings version.

Olay's Professionals (or ProX or Pro-X) (and it does seem pretty stupid to me to come up with a whole new line of products and give them such a lame name) is by far the most expensive drugstore line. I mean, the starter kit sells for $67. So whatever you call them ("the Olay stuff in the red containers" works for me) the point is, are they actually worth that much money?

Now, I'm assuming you aren't the kind of skin-care fanatic who haunts's skin care board, haunts Ulta and Sephora, and drops $250 a month on the latest, greatest dermatologist-developed/organic/imported products, because if you are, you have no business reading me. I have a passing acquaintance with all of that, but I have a life. And pretty good skin. And I don't expect miracles. Or need them.

That being said, if you're over 40, have dry skin, or can't tolerate titanium dioxide, I think you might like these products. They have niacinamide, (a vitamin B3 derivative) to shore up your stratum corneum, pro-retinol to aid in exfoliation and cellular turnover, glucosamine, and a cocktail of chemical sunscreens, all wrapped up in a light-reflective, unscented lotion that doesn't make me break out, leaves me with a matte finish, and a very slightly opalescent glow. There's a slight sunscreen reek when I first apply it, but it dissipates almost immediately.

I also got the Wrinkle Smoothing Cream ($47) and love it because it's rich, sinks right in, and has no fragrance. Maybe there's a masking fragrance, but I don't detect it. Thank goodness, because the last night cream I bought had ylang-ylang in it, and it drove me crazy.

No break-outs, no milia, no stink, and right now, Olay is offering a $25 rebate off any $50 purchase from the line, which makes the three-piece starter kit a real bargain.

I feel like Mikey in the Life cereal ad--I like it!

Friday, April 03, 2009

An open letter to the PR flaks out there

Dear Idiot:

You recently sent me an email suggesting I might want to post about the Easter dresses available on a website you're representing. It's a slow news day, so I checked out the pictures.

Now, I don't know what universe you live in, but the last time I checked, Easter is the only major celebration that takes place during the day. Sure, Halloween, New Year's Eve, and Fourth of July celebrations take place at night, but Easter celebrations are pretty much limited to church services, Easter egg hunts, and Easter brunches. As a result, Easter celebrations tend to be over by the middle of the afternoon.

Now, there are times where looking frisky and sexy is perfectly appropriate--for example, when offering strange gentlemen sexual favors in exchange for money. Or at a summer cocktail party.

Or at the Ascot races, where you can be as much of an exhibitionist as you like, as long as you're also wearing a huge, preposterous hat. But--just so you know--very tight, low-cut strapless mini-dresses are not usually worn to church at any time. Even if you're going to brunch afterward.

So let me give you a hint about daytime events that include religious services, like weddings, Christenings, and Bar Mitzvahs. The idea is to look "ladylike." Please acquaint yourself with the concept before sending me another email.

To sum up: the Easter bunny should never be confused with the Playboy bunny.

You're welcome,