What I Bought on my Spring Vacation: The first in a series of posts.

You might as well know at once that even though I have my moments of exquisite taste, and the Hermes store just sent me the latest scarf catalog, and one time a friend of mine asked me whether I'd help her decorate her house (that was probably ass-kissing, though) I have an unbelievable urge to buy things that are tacky. Or funny. Or offensive. Better yet--all three.

For example, I'm highly amused by the t-shirt that says ""If you fuck them, they will come."

I can't help it. I'm much too repressed ladylike to wear a shirt that says "fuck," but that shirt cracks me up. And I haven't even seen Field of Dreams.

So anyway, all this is to let you know that while I lay down the law about current fashions or hand out unsolicited advice the way DHC hands out samples, I also realize that I have a weak spot for The Truly Tacky.

So in my posts about what I bought on Spring Break, the first thing I'm going to talk about is these beauties:


You won't even know what this is about unless you've driven through Tennessee or Georgia. There used to be about 700 barns with SEE ROCK CITY painted on them. At last count there were only 90 left, but the billboards, which are ALL OVER THE PLACE, help to make up for the loss of actual barns.

Have I seen Rock City? No, I have not. Do I want to? Sort of. Is buying a souvenir of a place you haven't been to sort of stupid? Yes, it is. Especially when the item is a bird house that's trying to look like a barn. With a big-ass advertisement painted on it.

At first, I meant merely to buy one of these for my sister, as a joke, because she loves birds and bird houses and has all kinds of silly things all over her house and garden. But then, being me, I couldn't resist getting one for myself, too. Although I think I'm going to hang it from the kitchen ceiling, because the birds around here expect something a lot more tasteful, even from free housing.